Thursday, January 6, 2011

Decapitated Walls.

Blah feelings of doubt and insecurity.
Today was a really bad day at school, considering I got minimal sleep from staying up late last night finishing my Hamlet 12 page report I was on hypersensitivity mode.
In sociology we are learning about child early years development, attachment and the effect on later life. We are to write a report about our childhood. Mine would look like this, my mom screwed me up beat me up and  hates me, now i'm fucked with an ed cutting and anxiety.. that is not an option. Staring at the blank paper wonder how to concoct a wonderful lie of a beautiful childhood in contrast to my own childhood gave me a panic attack.
I'll make up something or not hand it in at all.
When I think about how much my childhood has screwed me up I want to puke.
Tomorrow I'm going out with friends to a comedy show which i won tickets to. I booked the tickets so I can get them at the door tomorrow, I always get fears something is going to go wrong.
Saturday I start my first of three belly dancing classes in hopes of some confidence.

2 comments:

  1. first, you posted at 11:11 :D
    im sorry you were given such a hard essay topic.
    good luck with belly dancing. <3

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  2. belly dancing sounds awesome! my therapist was telling me about attachment theory the other day, i thought it sounded interesting, maybe something i'll try to learn more about.

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