Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Why Wednesday Why!
Today three people where talking about me. About how I looked healthier compared to the 110-115 pound 10th grader I use to be. I'm 125-128 pounds and in 12 grade and this may have come as a compliment to anyone else but I felt discusting and awful and sick to my stomach when this was said I wanted to bawl my eyes out.
I want to be skinny skinny skinny so you know what...their going to watch me shrink! I'm done.
Me and my boyfriend even got into a fight today because I'm not happy enough for him, well sorry I don't know how to be happy 80% of the time. Fuck.
One of my friends said something that I have been thinking for a long time today: "If my own mother can't love me how can I expect anyone else to?"
....*goes to work out*
I'm working out till I throw up!