Monday, December 20, 2010


my parents shouldn't be called parents.
when I was small I was afraid to tell people what mother did to me because 1. I was just afraid she'd hurt me more and 2. I new they'd place me with my father and that scared me more for some reason that would be so hard to explain.
I grew up afraid and I still am afraid of what they can do to me.
I reach out to few maternal figures but I'm so afraid that if I connect with any they'll leave you know?
My parents hate each other and fight over everything  "usually me".
Tonight for example I was out of the house , the way I like it and when I got home my mother informs me my Dad had been calling threatning me for not calling him as usual and not being around and not being inside when he knew I was going to a friends, he was pissed, he was like fuck you merry christmas yadayada and then asks my mom for money which sets her on her anger towards him which turns to taking it out on me.
I hate being home...
How can I love me if my parents never did.


  1. oh, im so sorry that your parents are like that.
    and my REALLY sorry i cant give you more than a measly sorry.
    im sending you a virtual hug right now, because i know you need it.


  2. Im really sorry to hear this!! I really hope you can get it sorted out and focus on the great things life has to offer =) Im here if you need to talk/vent =)

    Bree =)

    p.s. thank you for following =)

  3. thank you for the comment dear; im glad you enjoy it. and thank you, i hope i truly deserve some happiness. so do you.