Work mind body and soul

Today I had my first day at work at a factory and I hated it. I have bruises on the inside of my arms from lifting boxes and cuts on my fingers from breaking up cardboard boxes and making christmas displays for items for walmart. You have to make so many in a certain amount of time, I was slow and so I did not get my break. I hurt so much and I work again tomorrow 4pm-11pm and possibly Friday.
To make it even worse it was pouring on my way home. I'm so tired and so ready to go to bed. I ate 200 cals today!
I do not want to attemd school tomorrow I'm not even doing anything in my classes tomorrow.

Ugg. Goodnight. The picture represents how whiped out I am and I don't think my body can handle the strain of the job.

My knight in shinning armour

At about 2:30pm my boyfriend came over to drag me out of bed, the one I had been curled up in all day not wanting to get out of. He took me to the mall, I do love clothing but I don't look good in it. I got a new winter jacket and some things with cameos on them (my secret love). He also took me to see the movie Easy A, I really liked it. He got me pizza, chocolate and popcorn, I stayed under 550 cals tho so tomorrow my limit is 450 because I over ate 50cals. I love him with all my heart with out him I'd never get out of bed. I started reading the Kite Runner for english and its not that bad. I have to do my earth science homework and sociology homework. I'll be up for a while but I'm a night hawk anyway :). Tomorrow I also start my first day of work, I will be working for a packing company working from 4pm till 11pm. Wish me luck! I need to save up for university in the fall! The picture represents someone who can get you to go outside, now only if I could go out looklike the girl in the picture.

Staying home

I woke up at 6am today having to get up for school. I automatically felt like staying in bed the whole day. It is like a dark feeling covers you and smuthers you. I still have yet to get out of bed. Depression sucks. My boyfriend called me on his lunch but he just doesn't get it. He thinks there has to be something making you sad and it has to be one thing. I didn't bother him too much about it because he was out to eat with his friends, he never takes me along. I just feel so down and I can't pick myself back up. I don't even know how to explain it.

I haven't eaten anything today and im on day one of the ABC diet so I have a 500 cals limit. Im going to eat less than that today. My picture today represents how I want to crawl out of my skin and feel the sun and like it. I think the white in this photo is very lovely.

Hello Blog.

Hello blog, you are going to mean so much to me now.
Today was Thanksgiving Monday here in Canada. I staired at my plate for an hour at the coffee table alone.
I am a vegitarian but I hate eating.
I hate eating with all that I have. I'm starting the ABC diet tomorrow, I'll let everyone know how it is going each day. For those who don't know the ABC diet is 50 days of restricted calorie intake.  The photo below is my photo to keep me going for now, I want so bad to have my clothes hang off of me.
To inform people, I have had an eating disorder since I was 10 and I started cutting when I was 11 and stopped just a few months ago and its so hard not to pick that razor up again. Comment anything, I can answer any questions you have about me.